Now that I have a nearly normal relationship with my daughter, who is now clearly an adult, I can identify with the customary growing pains. Here's an article I found on AARP (another group of people I identify with) about how to communicate and get along with my adult children (bio and step). I'm pleased to report that my husband and I have been intuitively following these guidelines, and that has helped us grow as parents, as a couple, and as human beings. This article nails it!
Parenting Adult Children: Are You a Good Friend to Your Grown-up Kid?
5 tips for relating to your now-adult child
by Elizabeth Fishel, Dr. Jeffrey Jensen Arnett, AARP
When your children reach their 20s, the balance of
connection between you and them seesaws. The challenge becomes how to find
common ground without overstepping the comfortable boundaries between you. The
issues become how much time to spend together and how to spend it, how much
information to share and about what, which battles to fight and when to turn
the other cheek, what advice to give and
when silence is golden.
In interviews for our forthcoming book, When Will My Grown-Up Kid Grow Up?, 75
percent of parents said that their current relationship with their adult
children was better now than the relationship they had when their kids
were 15. The best part, most agreed, is "the friendship that emerges along
with the adult."
